caring for aging parents

How to Develop a Caregiving Plan

Posted on 02/19/2014 by |Aging, Home & Family Expert | Comments

CaregivingI first spoke with my parents about their plans for “the future” when Dad retired from his career as a university professor in 1995. Mom had suffered a stroke six years earlier but was still mobile, and Dad was in good health. They had completed advance directives and estate planning. My caregiving plan was to help them stay as independent as possible for as long as possible. I’d visit three or four times a year, monitor their needs and coordinate with my …

It’s Not Easy Being in a Relationship with a Caregiver

Posted on 02/12/2014 by |Aging, Home & Family Expert | Comments

CaregivingEditor’s note: We asked Bill Carter, the longtime companion of AARP’s caregiving expert and blogger, Amy Goyer, to write about being in a long-distance relationship with a full-time caregiver. My relationship with Amy began seven years ago. At the time she was a busy professional working in Washington, D.C., and her parents were enjoying their retirement in Phoenix. Since I live in northern Maryland, our relationship had to be a long-distance one from the beginning. However, we thoroughly enjoyed each other’s …

Why I Thanked a Caregiver

Posted on 11/21/2013 by |Aging, Home & Family Expert | Comments

CaregivingMy older sister Linda Goyer Lane is part of the “sandwich generation”—people who care for their aging parents while simultaneously supporting children of their own. When my parents began needing 24-hour care about a year and a half ago, Linda stepped up in a big way to help me care for them. She and her two sons (one in high school, one in college) have all made sacrifices as she began traveling to Arizona for a week or two at …

Sibling Squabbles Over Mom? 7 Tips for Getting Along

Posted on 07/31/2013 by |Caregiving | Comments

CaregivingRelationships with siblings can be solid and fulfilling, yet when there are issues regarding aging parents, even the sweetest situations can turn strained or worse. Hot-button issues are almost always around money (your parents’, caregiving expenses and who pays), family possessions, Mom and Dad’s independence and safety, living arrangements or medical decisions. You know what they say about too many cooks in the kitchen…. Or not enough. Your brother and sister might be delighted to leave the caregiving to you. …

GPS Systems Track Loved Ones on Road Trips

Posted on 06/24/2013 by |Aging, Home & Family Expert | Comments

Home & FamilyRecently, 81-year-old Goldie Hunt and her husband, Vernon Hunt, 91, were reported missing after they set out on a 500-mile car trip from Garnet, Kansas to visit Goldie’s twin sister in Dwight, Ill. The alarming story thankfully came to a happy ending several days later when they were spotted by a law enforcement officer as they asked for directions in Michigan. The Hunts’ experience reminds me of a heartbreaking story several years ago 0f a Pennsylvania couple, William Fresch, 85, and his …

TEDMED’s Great Challenges Day Addresses Caregiver Crisis

Posted on 05/2/2013 by |Aging, Home & Family Expert | Comments

CaregivingRecently, I participated in the first TEDMED Great Challenges day which addressed 20  great challenges (see my previous post about the Dementia Tsunami, one of TEDMED’s Great Challenges). I participated in a breakout group of about 20 people who rolled up our sleeves and dove into a discussion of the “caregiver crisis.” It was an afternoon full of passion and spirit among all contributors. Many of us are or have been caregivers; others approached the topic from a business viewpoint (those who …