Finding the Healthy Sexual Aid for Him

Q: My wife doesn’t want me to take prescription sexual aids, such as Viagra, because she fears I’ll have a heart attack or stroke. It worked well for me, the first and only time I got to use it. In her defense, I did suffer a heart attack at 38. My question is, are there alternative over-the-counter drugs or natural herbs that can help? Dr. Pepper Schwartz: Have you talked to a doctor about this? I would at least get …

Overcoming Loss of Libido After Cancer

Q: I am 69 years of age and married. Three and a half years ago I had radiation treatment  for prostate cancer. The cancer is in remission. However, my libido has come to a screeching halt. I have no interest in sex, although I have forced myself to try masturbation to try for an erection. Occasionally this will work, but most times it is a failure. Because of my lack of libido, my wife and I are slipping away from …

I’m Just Not Interested

Q: I just read your article about having a celibate marriage, and my marriage has turned into that. Although it’s not due to any type of punishment – it’s just that I have lost all interest in sex. I love my spouse; he loves me. There are no problems, no stresses. We get along great, but I just can’t find the interest. My doctor said it was probably stress but I am retired and don’t have any. I’ve talked to …

Men Don’t Only Want Sex. They Want Friendship, Too

Q: I have been divorced for almost three years and am having difficulty meeting men. Most of the guys I encounter just want sex. I want more: respect, friendship, kindness, mutual enjoyment. Any suggestions? After 29 1/2 years of an abusive marriage, I would like to think there are some nice men out there. Dr. Pepper Schwartz: There are definitely some nice men out there. Of course, your life has been colored by an abusive marriage and you have to …

“She Wants to Know Details of My Infidelity”

Q: Last year, I confessed to my wife of 35 years that I’d had affairs with several women approximately 20 years ago. She’s in the process of forgiving me. We have agreed to move forward and have both seen counselors, separately. However, I feel she’s not really moving forward, due to the questions she has about my affairs. She wants me to share my story of infidelity with her: How was I able to do it? How could I do …

Ginny Johnson Not Given Enough Credit for Sex Study Contributions

Ginny Johnson’s death brings back a lot of memories. I remember, as a new Ph.D. and young professor, sitting around many living rooms with her and her even more famous husband, Bill Masters, talking about sex research, about women in the field, and about differences in opinions between the behavioral scientists (my group) and  the medical people (Bill’s and, to some extent, Ginny’s group). Ginny was Bill Masters’ partner in sex research. Starting out as a secretary in his office, she transitioned to the …