In My Dreams, My Wife Is the Only One Sleeping — Around!

Q: About 18 months ago I was put on AndroGel for low testosterone. It has worked well — my energy level is up, and so is my libido — but there’s a problem: I keep dreaming my wife is having sex with other men. The sex is quite graphic. It causes me to wake up about 2 a.m. with a very good erection, and leaves me unable to get back to sleep. The dreams stay on my mind throughout the …

Who Are More Unfaithful — Men or Women?

Q: In a recent column you said that in most long-term marriages that fail, men are generally the ones who cheat on their wives. I’d like to know where you got that information. The statistics I’ve read in the past few years show a higher incidence of infidelity from women than men. A: Fair enough — my information came from these two sources: 1. A study of 25,000 respondents that I did in collaboration with Jim Witte (a Harvard-trained demographer …

Hey, Miley: It Gets Better (Sex, That Is)

First the twerking. Now Miley Cyrus has proclaimed that sex ends at 40. Well, it doesn’t, experts say. AARP sex and relationship expert Pepper Schwartz points out that there are a lot of myths about sex and aging, including the notion that older people don’t – or shouldn’t – have sex. “For some reason, many people think sex belongs to the young,” she says. “If that were the case, our whole species would lose all sexual feelings as they age …

Depression Meds in the Way of Sex

Q: My husband and I both enjoy sex, but I suffer from severe depression and anxiety and have been on all kinds of medication for 10-plus years. I cannot do without them. I also cannot achieve orgasm. I’ve been to so many doctors, and they all say the same thing: It’s my meds. My question is: Do I have to pick between being happy on my meds, or having an orgasm? Lately it’s getting hard to pick. I really need …

Sex and Dementia: What Are Our Rights When We’re Not Ourselves Any More?

A recent Bloomberg article recapped an incident in a nursing home in which an employee walked in on two elderly residents, both diagnosed with dementia, having intercourse. The man was in his late 70s, the woman in her late 80s. The employee, a nurse, called for help and separated the two, but not without the woman clawing and screaming at them. It’s a delicate subject and the zone is completely gray. The incident led to the male patient being removed …

“She Wants to Know Details of My Infidelity”

Q: Last year, I confessed to my wife of 35 years that I’d had affairs with several women approximately 20 years ago. She’s in the process of forgiving me. We have agreed to move forward and have both seen counselors, separately. However, I feel she’s not really moving forward, due to the questions she has about my affairs. She wants me to share my story of infidelity with her: How was I able to do it? How could I do …