Three marriages — and lots of “empirical dating research” in between — have led me to a conclusion or two about men.
OK, make that five conclusions. Not about men in general, but about 50-plus fathers in particular, whom I’ve taxonomized below.
With the approach of Father’s Day on June 21— the year’s best opportunity for you to help any pater in your familias deal with age, weight and vanity issues — it’s time to leave the socks-and-tie gifts behind and consider some less conventional presents for your own quirky husband/boyfriend/dad:
So keep your favorite father figure healthy with a membership at a local gym or perhaps a fitness bracelet such as the FitBit Charge Heart Rate and Activity Tracker or the Jawbone-UP2 Wristband Black Diamond; both track calories burned, as well as number of steps taken and distance traveled. Then add a slimming black shapewear T-shirt to inflate his ego, not his belly: Choices include the Spanx for Men Zoned Performance V-Neck or the Insta Slim Compression V-Neck Shapewear for Men.
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2. The boy-man. He hasn’t reconciled himself to this whole “aging thing” quite yet, so he plays in a garage band on weekends, wears a baseball cap backward (despite your ongoing assessments of how ridiculous it looks) and rocks
3. The product tester. He’s not really a narcissist — just insecure. (Could your own high-maintenance regimen be fueling his obsession with looks?)
5. The oldie-but-goldie. He’s as likely to be moody as he is to volunteer for a makeover. Through life crises large and small, his battle garb has never varied: white socks and sneakers, boxy khaki “slacks” (his term), Hawaiian shirts and pastel polo shirts.
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Ease him into 2015 with neoclassics such as vintage wash chinos or a pair of slip-on black sneakers (goodbye, white socks!) such as Vans Slip-On Pro or Palladium Flex Slip-On. Then top things off with a now-classic striped tee; choices include Gap Essential Stripe T-Shirt or Asos Stripe Long-Sleeve T-Shirt with Boat Neck. The only thing left to do at that point is stand back and admire your — er, his — handiwork. What a guy!
For more 50-plus beauty and style tips, please take a look at my Wardrobe Wakeup: Your Guide to Looking Fabulous at Any Age .
Photos: Lois Joy Johnson, zazzle.com, belk.com, hm.com, zappos.com
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