One of my readers suggested that I sign up for the popular online dating site OkCupid. I wasn’t making much progress on other sites, so I gave this one a try. I found OkCupid fascinating.
Not just an online dating site, it's like a gigantic mirror reflecting a detailed analysis of your life preferences and tendencies. It provides an opportunity to better understand what makes you tick, and it’s cheaper than a psychiatrist.
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There is, however, a catch to finding a catch. You have to answer a gazillion questions to make the site effective, and so do prospective mates. With each additional answer, your percentage of finding a match increases, and the same holds true for your potential match. Both your chances of finding each other increase as you answer more and more questions similarly.
So, I began answering the questions. Like Pavlov’s salivating dog, I kept receiving rewards as I answered more questions. In fact, I couldn’t stop myself as my match percentages increased. First, my tail started wagging, and then I started to bark with excitement. I felt weird.
The questions could be even weirder than how I felt. Such as: “If you discovered upon death you must reincarnate into an animal, but are only allowed a broad choice as follows, which would you select?” On a more personal level: “Are you totally comfortable being naked around your lover, not just during sex?” Or more abstract: “If you were going to be marooned on a deserted tropical island, how ‘big’ would you want the island to be?”
I was sucked into the process. I wanted to reach 100 percent of answered questions and find my perfect 100 percent match. After being practically glued to my computer for three days, I found that I had to answer more and more questions to increase my percentages. I was at 99 percent at 900 answered questions. If I simply made it to 1,000 answered questions, surely I would reach that 100 percent mark.
But at 1,000 answered questions and still a 99 percent match, my tail stopped wagging. My bark went silent. I wanted to bite someone instead.
At 1,121 questions and still no 100 percent, I growled and stopped. With a quick search, lo and behold, there was one man who was my 99 percent match and hundreds of men who were 90 percent and higher.
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I discovered something very familiar about my Mr. 99% and will tell you about him next week. And, no, he’s not my “ wasband."
Coming Sept. 24: Is Mr. 99% Right Enough for Me?
*Names and identifying information have been changed to protect privacy and security.
Photo: TonyBaggett /iStock
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