Parenting Part 2

Mary W. Quigley, a journalist and author, has written two books about motherhood and work. An NYU journalism professor, she is the mother of three adult children, and blogs at www.mothering21.com

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How to Keep a Family Feud off the Turkey Day Menu

In Norman Rockwell’s familiar Thanksgiving fantasy, Grandma presents a glistening turkey to a happy, multigenerational family. Cut to real life: Disasters range from a firebombed deep-fried turkey to soggy pumpkin pie. And that’s just the food! Unlike the Rockwell tableau, some dinner table conversation more closely resembles the family fireworks in August: Osage County. Thanksgiving can come to mean “family, food, football and feuds,” says Helen Oxenberg, an advice columnist and social worker. >> 10 Tips for Caregivers During the …

Millennials Need Parents to Talk About Long-Term Plans

Religion, sex, politics and money rank as taboo topics for polite conversation, perhaps avoided with our adult children, too. But money should be on the table for the simple reason that our financial situation often affects our kids as we age. A reminder of that comes in an honest and heartfelt column by Yahoo financial adviser Mandi Woodruff about her parents. She writes: “These days, I find myself worrying far more about their financial futures than I do my own. …

What Exactly Is Your Adult Child’s Job?

In 1993, we celebrated the first Take Your Daughter to Work Day. But have you ever wondered what your kid does in a job that perhaps didn’t exist five years ago? What exactly is a social media manager, a data scientist or even an actuary? The answer will be offered Nov. 6 at Bring In Your Parents Day, an event sponsored and promoted by LinkedIn at 28 companies in 14 countries. While Google was the first firm to sponsor a …

When Scary Headlines Make You Anxious About Millennial Kids

When our millennial children live in another city or away at school, most of the time “out of sight” means “out of mind.” But breaking news headlines can raise our anxiety levels to high alert, and recently that seems almost a daily occurrence. Example: the disappearance and murder of University of Virginia sophomore Hannah Graham. It attracted national media attention during the last few weeks, and no wonder: Many parents immediately related to the story. Grown & Flown blogger Mary …

When Your Kid’s Romance Ends and You Hurt, Too

“They say that breaking up is hard to do. Now I know, I know that it’s true.”  That Neil Sedaka song was recorded twice — in 1962 and in 1975 — a testament to the truth of the lyrics. Breakups are painful, even when it’s not you but your adult child. At a recent wedding, a guest looked wistfully at the joyous couple and mentioned that his twentysomething son had ended a long-term relationship with a woman whom the father …

How to Handle Your Kid’s Depression or Anxiety

We’ve all received that phone call, email or text from our young adult child who’s lamenting some crisis or another. Often our response is, “This too shall pass.” But what happens when one bad day slips into another and another? Americans are reporting more symptoms of depression, such as trouble sleeping and concentrating, than people typically did in the 1980s, according to a new study. The results were especially striking among young people. Compared to three decades ago, college students are …