My biggest criticism of online dating is this: People lie. Like my ex. When I came across his profile on a site, he had shed eight years.
A man I dated a couple of months ago first told me he was separated, but later admitted he was actually still living in the same house with his wife. They’d been sleeping on opposite sides of the house for years, he said, but then he confessed that she recently slipped into his bed at least once, and not just for cuddling.
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As crazy as it sounds, I felt like he was cheating on me with his own wife. He wanted to continue the relationship, but I kicked him to the curb. It wasn’t easy. I confess I kind of fell for the feller.
The next guy I went out with lied about his politics to get a date with me. When I found out, I kicked him to the curb, too.
The online profile of my most recent prevaricator indicated he was 60, but I vetted him and found he was actually 70. I decided to go out with him anyway because he was the first man who asked many questions over the phone and seemed to take a sincere interest in me.
When we met, his online profile photograph proved to be as accurate as his professed age, but at least he showed great taste in restaurants by selecting a very special place with a garden and a pond. He also turned out to be a gentleman, and we had a nice evening. I didn’t tell him that I knew about his deception because that might be kind of judgmental at a time when lying seems to be uncontrollable.
Yet, I couldn’t help but wonder, is he lying about other “facts”? That’s not a healthy way to start a friendship. I feel conflicted.
Tonight’s date tells me he owns a 44-foot sailboat. Will it turn out to be a plastic sailboat he plays with in the bathtub? Or worse, a rubber ducky he actually believes is a 44-foot sailboat?
To get in the mood, maybe I’ll download the song “Liar” by Three Dog Night.
Coming Aug. 27: How to catch a date in a lie.
*Names and identifying information have been changed to protect privacy and security.
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